Quote

Other bellydancer: Is there a term for people with a fear of glitter?
Me: Un-fabulous!

I am businesslike

I just had a business call an hour early because my employer forgot the time difference between our countries. I am amused that the frantic scramble to make my room presentable for video skype I had to move ridiculous numbers of condom wrappers (they were just for work, I swear...or does that make it sound worse?), about eight smashed port bottles, and a pair of lurex hotpants. I then threw on a collared shirt and discussed eighteenth-century finance like a perfectly respectable human being. Ha.

Speaking of respectably human beings: Before the call I had been on the phone with my wife, who is at work at fretting that "there are dead bodies everywhere". She's pretty good at one-upping me with the work crises.

Enthusiasm

I just came across this exchange, from nearly a year ago:

-Is he your boyfriend person?

-He is my future husband! But I am trying to be cool about him. I may be failing.

-Are you seeing him tomorrow?

-Yes.

-What are you doing?

-Kissing!

Almost married!

My wedding is, unsurprisingly, a unique affair. It will involve some of the usual things such as prancing around a nice hotel in a dress that would made five-year-old me squeal with glee. Guests will range from a mercenary to an Oxford student - likely in subfusc - dashing in between exams to be my maid of honour. Nine Inch Nails and/or Metallica will be played. The best man has refused to make a speech. There is a Designated Jew to ensure glass-smashing and Hora-dancing takes place. One of the rings will be made of black metal because we really are that goth. I am so excited.

Whinge

It has come to my attention that 32% of all wedding invitations include diamante, whilst an additional 12% include some other form of sparkliness. Approximately 82% include hearts and/or bows and/or pink. Thus, within the card industry there is virtually no stylistic difference between a wedding an eleven-year-old's birthday. If one were to draw a Venn diagramme of this, one would see that approximately .002% of invitations involve neither hearts nor sparkles nor pink and that such invitations, due to their rarity, must be custom ordered at great expense and delay from realms far overseas.

My general feeling is that if one can take apart a wedding invitation, use it to decorate a burlesque dancer's costume, and still have the odd rose or rhinestone left over...it is probably not a good choice.

Drinking in style

Holly, reading the label of the liqueur we're drinking: "It says something in French"

Me: "What does it mean?"

Nic: "It means 'a taste of life in Paris'"

Me: "Oh, does that mean we're going to have a threesome?"

Quote

"Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting [...] What a ride!"

-Dad